Saturday, November 03, 2007

Post-Halloween Stress Disorder

Hannah here - Sorry that I didn't write my Saturday blog last week - there wasn't really anything interesting to blog about.

But today, oh, today, I've got a nice, tasty, fattening treat for you.

That's right.

Candy. Chocolate, Starbursts, Smarties, Bubblegum, anything you can possibly think of. This is why I hate Halloween. Because, even thought I am a young, fresh, thirteen-year-old, I still have fears. BIG fears. One in particular, the most dreadful two words in the history of dreadful words: Getting Fat. So, this Halloween I decided that I would boycott candy.

Haha. Ha. Hahahahaha.

I even forced myself to stay away from houses passing out candy. But, when you are sitting around with a HUGE bowl of candy to pass out to little kids, you can get carried away. The same goes for having three siblings who are all very much into the Halloween movement.

Every day starts out normal: I wake up, I get ready, I eat breakfast, and then I head out the door. But wait! What's that I hear?

"Hannah, Hannah, come heeeeere!"

"We are caaaaaalling to you, Hannah."

"Don't you want just ooonneeee little snickers bar?"

NO! I will fight the urge. I drag my unwilling feet out of the door and go to school. My tummy rumbles, all day long, no matter how much I eat for lunch. For it has heard the call of the wildly tasty candy, and will stop at nothing to get to this deadly treat.

I get home from school. Conveniently, every piece of candy in our house is strung about on the kitchen table. Oh, Three Musketeers, oh, Tootsie Rolls galore, oh, bliss.

Until I eat about five hundred pieces.

Then my dear stomache stretches out to unbelievable lengths, all in order to enjoy the full effects of an afternoon of candy.

EVERY DAY!

Can you feel my pain?
Am I the only one?
Is it wrong to feel this way as a thirteen-year-old?

Help me out, here!

9 comments:

Deanne said...

Hi Hannah! What a delima you've got going on! It's all normal though, so fear not. Maybe one thing you can do next week is to take one little candy bar in your lunch. That way your not completely depriving yourself and you would have something to look forward to, and therefore silencing the nagging voices. It's just a thought.

Elizabeth-W said...

The best advice I have is to let the little people eat it all as quickly as possible. They don't care about their waistlines. Then, it's out of the house for a few weeks until the rest of the winter holidays start.
Then again, you're 13. You should enjoy your youth. Dig in, I say :D

No Cool Story said...

EW is wise beyond her years Hannah, I'd listen to her.

I little tiny bit of chocolate never hurt anyone, everything in moderation :D

Tori :) said...

I say take a picture of your cute, flat tummy for when you're old and fat like me. I took my flat tummy for granted.
Just don't go overboard and you'll be fine.

Elizabeth-W said...

Oh, and I forgot to tell you and your mom to be on the lookout for pasty white tourists who are in their mid60s. (My parents are vacationing in your fair state for the week.)

Mary said...

Hannah, you are a crackup! First of all, you are teensie and you have inherited pretty good genes, so even though you are a teenager and these are things teenagers (and their moms) worry about, I hope you don't worry about it too much! Like EW said, enjoy your youth. And I'll add, appreciate your healthy, beautiful body!

For the candy dilemma though, I like the suggestions of allowing yourself to take a piece or two to school so you aren't totally depriving yourself. Then you can get your chocolate fix and don't go candy crazy once you get home and it's all there in front of you. A little chocolate now and then is a lovely, happy treat!

I love your guts you cutie!

Amber said...

Tooo funny! I was doing stellar on my diet until Halloween hit. I just threw in the towel, ate lots of chocolate and am back in the saddle again. Sometimes you've just gotta do it. ;-)

Suzanne said...

Exactly what Tori said! Ahh to be a young, fresh, thirteen-year-old again. Sounds lovely! :)

Amanda said...

I agree with what everyone else has said. Enjoy it while your young. :)